Big question why and a bigger answer...I think many things pointed me to this point in my life, but here are a few of the reasons why. Sorry Mum!
Ok well as most of you know I'm buddhist and have been focusing on it more in the last few years, I am reading a book called 'The Tibetian Book of Living and Dying' its quite a famous book, not just for buddhists but anyone of any faith or of no faith. It talks about essentially a way to live in today's world and how to die. I bought it maybe 6 years ago and haven't really been able to read it and understand and comprehend the ideas til this year. So the chapter I was reading talks alot about the connections we have to various delusions and the way we value things in a our life and life itself over things that should be important but are never really considered regularly.
And talking to people (mainly Trina, an inspirational woman) while I was in laos, we got to talking about it and then I a realisation that I was more scared to shave my head (so completely attached to my outter appearances) than I was to get a tattoo as now these days I have quite a few, most are hidden from people. And the crazy thing is a tattoo is there til the day leave this body, where my hair would grow back in a few months. Trina who also has done it 4 times now. So she was a bit of a katalyst for it as well. She actually did the cutting at a bus station in Udon Thani, Thailand, with a pair of scissors I bought from a stationary store, then I went to a barber to get the rest done and cleaned up (in Chiang Rai, Thailand) the next morning.
I have always admired girls who could do it. I have always wanted to do it for years but never had the guts and was scared of how people would react to my birthmark on my head as I was always told but my mother to cover it up and never show anyone for the sack of appearances... My birthmark happened during my birth, I was moving too much during it so the doctors decided to sedate me, they aimed for my arm but I moved as they were injecting through the stomach. They instead got my on my head (leftside) now as the result, luckily I survived but I have a mark of a bald patch that will never grow hair.
One thing that my friend who had done it, said that it was amazing and almost enlightenling because you have nothing to hide behind anymore, no safety net and people truely see the person you are and what you are about. No pretence. No ambition. Take it or leave it. So yeah guess thats kinda the reasons why I shaved my head really, in a nutshell anyway...
It has been one of the most unfathomable experiences of my life. I hope other find it as inspirational as I do.
No comments:
Post a Comment